From a lifetime ago…
“This is so painful. And I didn’t want to even write but I can’t take it anymore. This journal was supposed to be my positive journey and I didn’t want to taint it but the stale air forced me to close my old one. I am so sad, and I am so broken. This is how I have stayed for too long. Because this pain is too much to bear and the emotion is gut wrenching, I know I have me and I have forgiven the betrayals to myself. My betrayals for you that you have risked for a nothing. Maybe if I can just get out of this life enough then I will sleep finally. Alone in our bed, it’s like torture. A pain I have never known and it flows so purely from me I can almost touch it. I know there is another side when this will just be a memory but now this sobbing and broken girl has been stripped and left to deal with what she hasn’t been taught to handle. And through it all I still don’t regret a moment.”