Ladies, can we just have a moment of silence here, for all of the hours lost. Hours spent needlessly plucking, brushing, painting, pushing up, ironing, strapping in to, sucking in, zipping up, masking, squeezing into, waxing, applying, injecting, peeling, dying… all in an effort to look like something we don’t come by naturally?
Now I won’t get ahead of myself here, I have been and in some instances still am, guilty of these things. And in some cases I even think there is a necessary implement to some that I will circle back around to in just a minute…. follow me here.
For example, let’s talk about padded and underwire bras. I fell into the lure of Vicki’s dirty little Secret – and the secret is she’s not really that big! The jig is up! I used to have huge boobs and got them reduced because at 18 I had back problems and sagged worse than a 70 year old woman… oh sure with a hold-those-suckers-up kinda bra, they looked great, but between the one inch indentions left on my shoulders, the ache in my back, and how I felt when I was naked, it was a no brainer to downsize. But still, even with the relief and newly being “perky for life” set, being smaller somehow made me feel like less of a woman, so here I go, lets pretend I am still a double D cup, when in truth I’m a full B, small C. It’s false advertisement, just like a man with a beard that one day shaves to baby face… or the ones always in a hat, “whatchu hidin under there dude?” ::gives the side eye:: Looking back I cannot think of any reason I would have thought effectively wearing a wire cage around my chest was good for my girls. I mean seriously, if someone sees you naked, or even in a bathing suit (unless made in the same sadistic way) they are going to see the real deal. So why do we insist on displaying the unreal version?! To get the guy that likes big boobs, and then “surprise! Just kidding”?! Seriously. I am all about going braless, (I know, gasp!) and when I need to wear one (for socially necessary times, you know like work) I have become a huge fan of just a little bralette or sports bra – so much more comfy ladies… trust me (sorry in advance for you well-endowed gals, been there). I love my lil boobs, you’re concern for them is not necessary, k thanks. Muah!
Another one that just floors me was my obsession with not having nekked toes. Again, it goes without saying, manicuring ones self is very important, and no one needs or wants to see busted feet… flip flop season is close y’all… but what difference does it make if they are painted or not… “hey fella, my eyes are up here!” ::eye rolls::
Or make-up, I still wear it of course, it’s just no longer a full work up design just to leave the house to get the mail. I mean if you do not even get recognized with out your make up, something is amiss. I like to wear make up to highlight my features, not shlob it on to look like something I am not. Guilty of it in the past, I absolutely cringe at the ridiculous amount of time and money I spent on 3 layers of cover up and foundation, bronzer, 4 eye shadows, two blushes, high lighter, eye liner, mascara, lip finish, all for one look… I have to leave out brow work here, because I just can’t condemn good brows… shew back in the day though (yikes – kidding – not really).
I could go on, but the point is accepting ourselves as we are. There is such beauty in that. It’s about not doing any of the above, or anything else, for anyone other than yourself. And I am not knocking anyone who does. If it is for you, if it makes you feel good, go for it! I say tweeze away, I don’t want a unibrow either! Get lasered, if you feel like you would rather not spend time shaving, I hate razor burn! Get the facials because we all deserve some pampering! I love to dress up and wear heels to go out with my gals, but I sure as hell won’t do it if I am going to be uncomfortable all night, and ladies we know you are cold… grab the jacket!
I guess it is coming with age, feeling so comfortable in my own skin, I will accept that. But again, I am not saying self care is not important, just the opposite actually… do it for yourself! Let the girls be free, age gracefully, forget the chemical paint leaching into your body through your nails, stop enduring endless hours in front of the mirror in hopes that the world will receive you better.
You do you, babe! Be friends with your body, she is the only one you get, and from where I am sitting, I am bettin she’s pretty bad-ass! You are the only one of you we get!
Sending you lots of love!