We have all heard it before, some of us guilty of it without even intending to.  It is doubtful but possible that I have made the mistake of using it in an unnecessary way before, but every time I hear it out of context I usually end up embarrassing or offending the culprit.

“So my gay friend, Kris..” Nope – just your friend.

“We went to this gay wedding…”  Nope again – just a wedding.

“They are a gay couple…” I can’t even with this one – they are just a couple!  Anyone can deduce their sexual orientation by seeing that they are with a man or a woman and further – unless they are trying to get with you, what. does. it. matter?

Seriously?! Shut the fooooook up with that!  Do you ever hear a straight person say, “So we were at this straight party this weekend and you will never believe the food spread.”  I mean come on.

Why does anyone feel like that needs to a descriptor word for ANYTHING?  Maybe it is lost on me.  Sure, there are instances where explaining something about someone would include their race or preference or religion, like when that is the topic.  But, not every topic involving someone who is gay needs to be predefined by that.

Just a sister, not a gay one.

Just a co-worker, not a gay one.

Are you following me here?  No one ever in the history of explaining a straight person has had to define them as such.  Why would we need to do anything different for someone who is in fact gay?

All of these questions, really have no other valid answer other than – No, no one should or needs to do that so just stop already.  I do think this applies to a lot of other descriptors used in the most unnecessary ways ever, but for today this is the one I decided to rant about.

K – thanks.

Sidebar – I am straight and feel inadequate speaking on this, same goes for racial issues etc. I feel like until I have been the oppressed, I am not qualified to be the baton holder.  As a woman, I do understand certain aspects but would never compare.  Still, it bothers the hell outta me, so here it is either way.

Do better y’all, be kind, be better!

T