Uncontrollably ME

Strong like bourbon, sweet like tea

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Heavy stuff

Anxiety disorder, as the (dark) fog lifts

Tuesday Night. The fog started to lift.  Just a smidge.  The first sign I could believe in was my appetite coming back.  It is this voracious hunger like I haven’t fed myself in days.  The strength it takes to survive… Continue Reading →

#anxietylife

                                            Monday night. I broke my “boss lady” wine glass… maybe it’s a sign, a sign of enough wine…… Continue Reading →

Loving with what is left.

  You took the part of me that cared the most. The part that loved unconditionally. The innocence, That could trust and believe in the good of another human. All of the positive feels that poured out of me and… Continue Reading →

Devastated.

The loss of a child is something I cannot wrap my brain around.  Knowing that it was their choice to end their life, would do nothing short of kill me.  I know loss happens, I know many who have lost… Continue Reading →

831 – Shelly’s story

Eight hundred thirty-one. She stared blankly at the register screen. “Ma’am, will that be cash or charge?” As Shelly stared down at her ever-evolving baby bump under hideous looking maternity clothes, tears welled up in her eyes and she swallowed… Continue Reading →

Love > Hate

LOVE > hate So l dreamt last night that I was back in my old home, with my abusive ex. Day after day, in this dream, I was assaulted, raped, and battered.  Scarred, broken, weak.  One day I had a… Continue Reading →

Tacos and tequila, interrupted.

In between tacos and tequila, I realized I was a distraction from the real work you needed to do. I was an enabler without even being aware of it. Until it hit me. Until it was glaring in my face… Continue Reading →

More on the key…

So I realized after the last post, that I was so relieved to have had some clarity, I didn’t really talk about the actual key.  And as it turns out, it was not the crying, wouldn’t it be lovely though… Continue Reading →

This night, late night pondering.

So it seems what numbs my mind ails my heart, but “avoiding” it (as my doc recommends) also ails my heart.  My numbing of choice this night, wine.  This looming feeling visits often but has become like an old book… Continue Reading →

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